Is it bad etiquette to respond a second time? Ah well, screw it if it is.

I've been thinking about what you wrote here and I think I missed the crucial point here.

Perhaps your family has confused "tolerate" with "condone?" While I'd love it if everyone's hate could evaporate, it just isn't going to. There are many, many things I think of as immoral that I certainly do not condone but choose to tolerate. An obvious example? The Ku Klux Klan. I certainly do not condone their hate but I tolerate them because the alternative is to decide free speech is not for every American.

Perhaps if they thought it was okay to "tolerate" gay marriage because that was different from condoning it, that might change a couple of minds?

Just a thought.